Being Single During the Holidays

Being Single During the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

You’re single yet again during the holiday season? Contrary to popular belief, you don’t have to look at your glass of egg nog as being half empty. While your family members will inevitably interrogate you about your love life, at least you don’t have to worry about embarrassing and/or impressing a significant other. This means you can get hammered without any regret. You also don’t have to worry about displaying too much affection publically (PDA) in front of your grandma and your degenerate third cousin. How much does shopping for a romantic partner suck? You never know what the fuck to get, and when you do make a decision, you pray to God your gift isn’t shitty in comparison to the gift you receive. Good thing your single self won’t have to deal with these issues this year. Just make sure you avoid the mistletoe at all times and the holidays shall indeed be happy this year!

Brett McGinnComment